Reka tuganire kumunota umwe kubyerekeye gufata ukuboko. Oya simvuze gufata amaboko hamwe numukunzi wawe, cyangwa ikindi kintu nkicyo. Ndashaka kuvuga gufata amaboko hamwe numwana wawe.
Akenshi, iyo umwana yiga kugenda, cyangwa iyo ari "umutambukanyi mushya" umubyeyi aba afashe ukuboko bagenda. Rimwe na rimwe, barashobora kugenda bigenga, ariko birumvikana ko ari steadier mugihe ufashe ukuboko kwabantu bakuru. Iyo umwana ari munini gato kandi ukaba utabashyize mumugare cyangwa mukigare, urashobora kubabaza (soma hano: manda) kubagufata ukuboko mugihe ugenda hejuru ya parikingi cyangwa mububiko. Ukora ibi kugirango ubungabunge umutekano, sibyo? Ariko tuvuge iki mugihe umwana atagomba byanze bikunze ibyo mumyaka yabo y'ubuto? Cyangwa tuvuge iki niba aricyo gihe cyonyine bumvaga bafite umutekano mumuryango wavutse… ni mugihe bafashe ukuboko kwabantu bakuru? Birashoboka ko umubyeyi atabonetse mumarangamutima mubundi buryo usibye gufata ukuboko k'umwana.
Igitekerezo cyanjye ni iki… rimwe na rimwe abana bava mu ihahamuka bakunda gufata ukuboko k'umuntu mukuru nyuma y'umwana utagaragara. Nagira ngo nkeke (kuko ntabwo arikintu nakurikiranaga icyo gihe) ko abahungu banjye bakuru, neurotypical birashoboka ko bahagaritse gufata ukuboko kubushake mfite imyaka igera kuri itanu. Ntabwo bivuze ko ntaracyatsimbaraye mugihe twari mubihe bishobora guteza akaga, ariko uko bagenda bakura gato mbona ko batazabura imbere yimodoka cyangwa ngo barebe mbere yo kwambuka umuhanda, nibindi, nasanze ntagomba gufata amaboko igihe cyose… nuko birahagarara.
Ariko ubu mfite umwana wimyaka icyenda ugifata ukuboko mugihe turi muri parikingi, cyangwa iduka ryuzuye abantu, cyangwa parike yimyidagaduro myinshi… mubyukuri ahantu hose hari abantu benshi cyangwa ahari akaga. Ntabwo ari ukuboko kwanjye gusa… azanafata ukuboko kwa se, n'amaboko ya bakuru be niba bahari. Ubwa mbere byarantangaje rwose, ariko nyuma menye ko ari ukubera ko ashaka kwiyobora no kumva afite umutekano. Kubwimpamvu iyo ari yo yose, yumva atagengwa na gato cyangwa arwaye gato muri ibyo bihe. Kandi rero adufashe ukuboko kugeza ibyiyumvo birangiye.
Igihe yatangiraga gukora ibi birenze imyaka igera kuri itandatu, nari mpangayitse gato… kandi nkuko bisanzwe, nagerageje kumenya icyo bivuze kandi kuki yabikoraga? Kandi mubyukuri biratangaje? Kandi nanjye, mvugishije ukuri, mpangayikishijwe nibyo abandi bantu batekereza. Kandi rimwe na rimwe ibyo biracyanyuze mu bitekerezo byanjye, kuko aho bigeze, birashobora rwose kuba bidasanzwe kubantu batatuzi. Umwana wanjye ntabwo ari muto kandi ntabwo ndi muremure; Nakubise hafi nka 5'2 ”, kandi afite imyaka icyenda, arafunga byihuse kuri 5 'muremure… birashoboka rero ko bisa nkibisekeje. Ariko nzi ko kubwinyungu ziwe, ngomba gushyira ku ruhande izo mpungenge nibitekerezo byose abandi (soma: abanyamahanga) bashobora kuba bafite. Ibi ndabikora kubwumwana wanjye, ntabwo nkorera undi muntu wese ushobora kureba. Niba bashaka guca urubanza, nikibazo cyabo. Niba bashaka kubaza impamvu ari manini kandi agifata ukuboko, ibyo ni byiza cyane mbere, ariko nababwira ko abishaka kandi ntabwo ari ikibazo kinini.
Nyizera iyo mvuze nti: Nzi ko asa nkufite imyaka 12, afashe ukuboko kwa mama… ariko kandi nzi ko bishoboka ko kumyaka 12, azakomeza kumfata ukuboko… kandi nibyiza. Ngomba kuba sawa nayo, bityo azaba sawa nayo. Kandi dore impamvu ari byiza: ntabwo bibabaza umuntu, kandi mubyukuri bifasha. Twakoze igihe kirekire kandi gikomeye kugirango tumwunganire, kandi agaragaze icyo ashaka nicyo akeneye muburyo bwiza abantu bashobora kumva. Kandi iyo tugenda, akamfata ukuboko, ibyo birambwira rwose, "Ndagukeneye nonaha. Sinkeneye ko uvuga ikintu icyo ari cyo cyose cyangwa ngo ugire icyo ukora… Nkeneye ko ubaho. ”
Kandi simbizi neza, ariko nagira ngo nkeke gukeka ko nuburyo bwe bwo kuvuga ati: "Urakoze kuba uri hano kuri njye, kandi ufite umutekano." Nzi kandi niba namubajije impamvu yamfashe ukuboko, ntabwo yashobora kubivuga mu magambo… kandi nabyo ni sawa; biragoye kuri benshi muritwe, ndetse nkabantu bakuru, kumenya neza impamvu dukora ibyo dukora. Murugero, aracyabona ubufasha mumabwiriza akeneye.
Sinzi rero niba hari kimwe muri ibyo kijyanye n'ibibazo byawe… haba muri iki gihe cyangwa se mu gihe kizaza, ariko ndizera ko byagushimishije kandi bikagufasha kumenya ko mu byukuri bidasanzwe cyangwa bidasanzwe… Ni ubundi buryo bwawe umwana yasubiwemo kubera ihahamuka kandi niba ushobora kurenga ububi ushobora kuba wumva ufite bwo gufata ukuboko kwumwana mukuru, ushobora ahubwo gushimira ko byerekana ko aguhuza nawe.
Mubyukuri,
Kris