Today’s post piggybacks on the last, as it talks about ways the school can help kids in care (or at least strive to help!).
First of all, just being aware of the potential triggers we discussed last time and aiming to avoid them if at all possible would be a huge step for kids coming to school who have been removed from trauma. And beyond that are various other ways that the school/teachers can be supportive of kids in care, as well as their biological and foster parents.
And before I list them, let me say this: I know that it might be difficult for you, as a foster parent, to approach the school about all of this but maybe decide which two or three would be the most impactful and beneficial for your child and bring those to the school’s attention. Then if that goes well, maybe mention some others. But that’s just my two cents.
All that is to say: here are a few thoughts that I (and a few contributing others) have about how the school can help kids in care.
• Using words like “grownup” or “adult” instead of “parent” is more inclusive for all the kids, not only kids in care
• Consideration given when doing family tree / baby photo / family-related projects or classroom discussions
• Going one step further with that: allowing the student to make two Mother’s Day or Father’s Day gifts, or Christmas/holiday gifts, so there is one for birth family and one for foster family (if they choose)
• Contacting the foster parents ahead of time (if possible) when there will be a substitute teacher
• Offering Trust Based Relational Intervention (TBRI) / Trauma-informed training for all staff
• Giving grace to a student who misses class due to court, a parent visit, etc.
• Providing space in the classroom (or somewhere in the school) where a child can have a sensory break or “calm-down space”; can be as simply as a small tent, enclosed swing, etc.
• Allowing a bathroom break for the child whenever needed
• Allowing the student to eat a snack or get a drink of water whenever needed
• Offering friend/support/grief groups on site for kids in care, facilitated by trained adult(s)
• Extending grace to the child each day; teachers and staff giving a clean slate and letting mistakes or issues of the previous day not be held over to the next
• An understanding on part of the principal and teacher(s) that the child might struggle from Day 1, of maybe after a “honeymoon period.” Whenever the child shows signs of struggling, then is the time to act – not “wait and see.”
• Additionally, moving quickly on IEPs and 504s (which can often take a long time) in order for a child to receive accommodations and helps immediately
• Having visual schedules for “what happens next” so there are no surprises, and making sure to discuss any changes in plans to the regular school day schedule
• Help caregivers/foster parents/kinship establish support services such as free breakfast and lunch
As with all things on this blog this is clearly not an all-inclusive list, but hopefully it gives you a jumping off point and gives you enough suggestions which would benefit your child that you can go to the administration to advocate effectively.
Aufrichtig,
Kris