Kimwe no mubice byose byubuzima, hari ibintu bikwiye kuvuga nibintu bidakwiriye kuvuga… kandi ibi birakoreshwa rwose mugihe uganira nababyeyi barera. Noneho… Niteguye rwose kugirira neza abantu kuko nzi ko byinshi muribi bintu bivugwa kubera ubujiji cyangwa kubwo gukora chit-chat idafite ishingiro kumurongo ku biribwa cyangwa nibiki; mubisanzwe, abantu ntibatanga amagambo yabo cyane (niba ahari) kandi ntamuntu numwe wagiriye nabi umuntu nkana.
Mu bindi bihe, ibintu bivugwa gusa kuberako abantu bashaka kugirana isano numuryango urera, ariko ntibazi icyo bavuga, cyangwa uburyo bwo kubaza ibibazo bikwiye.
Noneho hariho abantu barimo gucukura umwanda, kandi ntakintu nakimwe kijyanye n'ikiganiro kizagirira akamaro umuryango urera; bizakora gusa kugirango uhaze amatsiko yuburwayi bwuwabajije ibibazo (ushobora kumbwira ibi biranshavuza?).
Ahanini rero, dore inama ndimo guha abo muri mwe bashobora kuba bibaza uburyo banyura kuriyi ngingo:
- Niba uri hanze kandi ukabona umubyeyi numwana batagaragara ko basangiye genetiki, ntukabaze ibibazo byawe bwite.
- Niba uzi umubyeyi n'umwana, ukaba uzi ko badahuje genetiki, ntubaze ibibazo byawe bwite.
- Niba udashaka kubazwa bisa, kubaza ibibazo umuntu utazi cyangwa numuntu muziranye, ntukabaze ubwoko bwibibazo kubandi bantu.
Urimo kubona drift yanjye hano? Ntukabaze ibibazo byawe bwite. Ntabwo ari umurimo wumuntu kandi niyo umuntu adashaka kuba nosy, arashobora kuba. Mubunararibonye bwanjye, impamvu yonyine umuntu ashobora kumbaza ibibazo byumwana wanjye cyangwa umuryango we ubyara ni uguhaza amatsiko ye ntabwo ari uguteza imbere ubwanjye cyangwa umwana wanjye. Abantu benshi ntibashobora kubimenya niyo mpamvu ndengereye hano hamwe na "Ted Talk" yanjye kuriyi ngingo.
Mubijyanye, ariko cyane cyane, imitsi, ntabwo ababyeyi barera gusa batagomba kubazwa amakuru yihariye yinkuru yumwana, ntanubwo umwana agomba kubazwa. Ntabwo ari umurimo wa buriwese, kandi mvugishije ukuri kubaza ibibazo nkibi birashobora gutera amarangamutima umwana urera… kandi nzi neza ko 100% nzi neza ko ntamuntu numwe ugambiriye gukurura umuntu, cyane cyane umwana urerwa. Amateka yumwana ninkuru yabo yo kubwira uwo bashaka, igihe cyose abishakiye… ntabwo byanze bikunze abamenyereye kurusengero cyangwa umuntu utazi kumurongo uri inyuma yibyo kurya. Kandi byumvikane ko umwana ashobora kugira ikibazo kitoroshye cyo gusobanurira umuntu mukuru, bityo umwana agabana byinshi kuri we kuruta uko bamwishimira gukora… kuberako umuntu mukuru atakoresheje imipaka ikwiye.
Kugeza ubu ushobora kuba utekereza, “Niki uyu mugore avuga ku isi? Ni ubuhe bwoko bubi cyangwa budakwiye abantu babwiye, cyane cyane ku mwana? ” Nibyiza, ntugahangayike… Ndi hano kugirango nguhe ingero nke, nshyashya kuri ba mama mubarera no kurera. Buri kimwe muri ibyo byavuzwe cyangwa cyabajijwe mama nzi, kandi nzi neza ko hari ibindi bintu byinshi bitagira ikinyabupfura cyangwa uburangare bumvise bahisemo kutagabana cyangwa bahatiye kwibagirwa.
Nta tondekanya ryihariye, hano hari bike (haribyo rwose birahari, nyamuneka nyamuneka ntusuzume urutonde rwuzuye muburyo ubwo aribwo bwose) bwibintu bidakwiye kandi bidakwiriye Kutabwira ababyeyi barera cyangwa barera cyangwa abana babo (kandi kuruhande Probably birashoboka ko batagira ikinyabupfura kubwira umuntu uwo ari we wese, ntabwo ari imiryango irera gusa):
“Se agomba kuba ari umunyamahanga.”
”Wow! Wuzuye amaboko! ”
“Mbega abakozi bakomeye!” Mubisanzwe byakurikiranwe, “Uzi igitera ibi, sibyo?”
“Wamuvanye he?”
“Uravugana na mama wabo NYAKURI?”
“Wow! Yizeye neza ko nta muntu n'umwe mu muryango! ”
Ati: “Niba ntawe umubishaka, ntituzabura kumujyana.”
“Agomba kubona amabara ye kuri se!”
“Aww, umwana wawe ni mwiza cyane… akomoka he?”
“Ni mwiza cyane. Menya neza ko ababyeyi be batamubona bose barikumwe gutya. Bazashaka ko agaruka. ”
“Sinshobora kwizera ko ababyeyi babo batabashakaga.”
Ati: “Noneho, byari ibiyobyabwenge?”
“Bose ni abawe?”
“Yoo, sinshobora na rimwe kubikora. Nari kwizirika cyane. ”
“Ntabwo nashoboraga kubasubiza.”
Aha, nzi neza ko bitewe nuko natoranije ibitekerezo kugirango mpagarare bonyine, wowe, abanteze amatwi bashishoza, murashobora kubona impamvu nta kintu na kimwe muri ibyo cyaba gikwiye kuvuga. Nkibisanzwe.
Nibyo… twese twavuze ibintu byubupfu mugihe kimwe cyangwa ikindi? Birumvikana, kandi sinkeka ko iyi blog yanditse izakuraho ibitekerezo byose bibabaza kandi bidafite ishingiro byerekeza kubabyeyi barera cyangwa abana bashinzwe. Biragaragara ko ibyo bitazigera bibaho.
Intego yanjye nukuyishyira inyuma yibitekerezo byabantu kugirango NIBA havutse ikibazo kandi ikiganiro nababyeyi barera cyangwa umwana urera, umuntu wasomye ibi azahagarara byibuze mbere yo kuvuga ikintu kibabaza cyangwa atabigambiriye.
Urakoze kuza muri "Ted Talk."
Mubyukuri,
Kris