• Byasuzumwe
• Nta gihamya gifatika
• Bifite ishingiro, nta ruhare rw'urukiko
• Bifite ishingiro, uruhare rw'urukiko

(Menya ko uru rurimi rushobora gukurwa ku rubuga rwa DCS, kuko ndashaka kwemeza ko mpa amakuru nyayo ya 100%.)

Byasuzumwe

DCS 310 irasuzumwa muri Indiana iyo raporo itujuje ibisobanuro by’ihohoterwa rishingiye ku bana cyangwa kutitabwaho nk’uko biteganywa n’amategeko ya Indiana, nta makuru ahagije yo kumenya cyangwa kumenya umwana cyangwa umuryango, cyangwa ibyabaye bivugwa ko byabaye hanze ya leta nta ngaruka mbi ku mwana uri muri Indiana ubu. Icyemezo cyo gusuzuma 310 gifatwa n’umuyobozi ushinzwe kwakira abantu nyuma yo gusuzuma raporo n’amakuru ayishyigikira. Kimwe mu bitagaragara mu gusuzuma ni igihe raporo zivuga ko umwana muto udafite aho aba acumbikiwe ahabwa icumbi muri gahunda yagenwe; ibi bishobora kudasuzumwa, nubwo hari ibindi bintu bigaragaza ko hagomba gusuzumwa.

Raporo idafite ishingiro

Niba iperereza rya Indiana DCS rigaragaje ko ibirego byo guhohotera cyangwa kutita ku bandi "bidafite ishingiro," (bivuze ko nta kintu na kimwe kiri muri ibyo birego kandi ko atari ukuri cyangwa ko bitagaragajwe), urubanza rurarangira, kandi nta kindi gikorwa kirafatwa. Umuryango nta ngaruka z'igihe kirekire uzagira, kandi raporo ishobora gukurwa mu rutonde rw'abashinzwe kurengera abana.

R ishingiye ku bimenyetsoraporo, Nta ruhare rw'Urukiko

Niba DCS isanze ibirego "bifite ishingiro" (bivuze ko hari icyo bireba kandi ko umwana akeneye kurindwa) ariko ikabona ko umwana atari mu kaga ako kanya, urubanza rwemewe rushobora kwirindwa binyuze mu masezerano y’ubushake. Hari uburyo bubiri bushoboka hano: Amasezerano yo Kohereza Serivisi (SRA) cyangwa Gahunda yo Guhindura Ibisabwa mu buryo Butari bwo (IA).

SRA bivuze ko umuryango wemera ku bushake kwitabira serivisi zisabwa na DCS. Muri izi serivisi harimo, ariko ntibigarukira gusa ku bujyanama, amasomo yo kurera abana, cyangwa kuvura ibiyobyabwenge. Kandi kubera ko ibi bikorwa ku bushake bw'umuryango, bikorwa nta cyemezo cy'urukiko.

IA isobanura ko DCS ishobora gusaba serivisi zigenzurwa n'urukiko, ku ruhushya rw'umubyeyi cyangwa umurera. Ibi bisaba uruhushya rw'urukiko ariko birinda gutangaza ku mugaragaro ko umwana ari Umwana Ukeneye Serivisi (CHINS). IA isanzwe imara amezi atandatu ariko ishobora kongerwaho amezi atatu bibaye ngombwa.

R ishingiye ku bimenyetsoraporo, uruhare rw'Urukiko

Niba DCS yemeje ko urukiko rukeneye ubufasha mu kurinda umwana, ikigo kizatanga ikirego mu rukiko rw'abana kivuga ko umwana ari "Umwana Ukeneye Serivisi" (CHINS). Ubu ni bwo bwoko bw'icyemezo umuryango w'umwana urera wabonye. (Hano kandi niho nzashingira cyane ku magambo yemewe, kuko ntashaka ko hari ikintu kibi mbona.)

Iyo umwana amaze gusaba kuba umukinyi w’umwana (CHINS), hazabaho iburanisha ry’ibimenyetso. Umucamanza w’urukiko rw’abana aburanisha kandi DCS igomba kugaragaza ibirego mu "gupima ibimenyetso byinshi". Kuri iyi ngingo, iyo urukiko rusanze umwana atari umukinyi w’umwana, urubanza ruraseswa. Ariko, iyo urukiko rusanze umwana ari umukinyi w’umwana, urubanza rwimukira mu cyiciro cyo kwimura umwana. Mu iburanisha ry’imburagihe, umucamanza akora gahunda y’urubanza igaragaza serivisi n’ibikorwa umuryango ugomba gukora. Ibi bishobora kuba birimo (ariko ntibigarukira kuri):

• Amasomo yo kurera abana
• Kuvura indwara zo mu mutwe cyangwa ibiyobyabwenge
• Gusura mu rugo
• Gusurwa
• Ubuvuzi bw'umuryango
• Kubona amacumbi ahamye n'akazi

Byongeye kandi, bitewe n'ibirego n'umutekano w'umwana, niba urukiko rwemeje ko umwana adashobora kuguma mu rugo mu mutekano, umwana ashobora kwimurwa by'agateganyo agashyirwa mu muryango cyangwa agashyirwa mu kigo cyita ku bana (mu gihe byaba ari ukwimurwa mu kigo cyita ku bana, birumvikana ko yakwimurwa agashyirwa mu kindi kigo cyita ku bana). Nk'ikigo cyita ku bana, birashoboka cyane ko uzi intambwe zikurikira nyuma yo kwimurwa n'ingaruka zabyo ku muryango w'umwana, bityo nzabisuzuma vuba.

Kenshi na kenshi, intego ya mbere ni uguhuza umuryango (guhuza umuryango nyuma yuko ababyeyi barangije ibisabwa muri gahunda y'urubanza). DCS ikora isuzuma rya buri gihe ryo guhuza umuryango kugira ngo imenye niba umuryango uri gutera imbere. Iyo umuryango udashobora kuzuza ibisabwa byo guhuza umuryango mu gihe cyagenwe n'urukiko, DCS ishobora gusaba urukiko guhagarika uburenganzira bw'ababyeyi. Ibi bishobora kubaho iyo umwana yirukanywe mu rugo igihe kirekire, ubusanzwe kikaba amezi 12 kugeza kuri 15, bitewe n'urubanza. Ariko, bishobora kumara igihe kinini cyangwa gito, bitewe n'urubanza rumwe ku giti cyarwo. Niba kongera guhuza umuryango bidashoboka, urukiko rushobora kwemeza izindi ntego zirambye ku mwana, nko kurera umwana, kumurera byemewe n'amategeko, cyangwa kumushyira mu muryango cyangwa ababyeyi barera abana babishoboye kandi bafite ubushake kandi bashobora kurera umwana.

Ariko kubera ko iyi nyandiko ari iyanyu, mwebwe ababyeyi barera abana, mushobora kuba mwibaza uko inzira yaba imeze mu gihe mwaba mwatumijwe 310, none dore uko bigenda:

Ese hari uburyo bwo gukuraho iyo 310 nta gihamya ifatika ifite? Ntabwo ari kenshi, ariko birashoboka. Ibi bishobora kuba bitewe n'uko umubyeyi urera umwana atanze integuza, icyifuzo cy'itsinda, cyangwa kwemera ko kuba umwana ari ikibazo kidashoboka. Bishobora kuba ari ukurinda ubusugire bw'umubyeyi urera umwana, kugabanya ibyago byo gushinja ibinyoma mu gihe kizaza, cyangwa kubera ko 310 yagaragajwe ko hari ibintu bituma iyi gahunda yo guturamo iteje akaga cyane (hari imyitwarire idakwiye hagati y'abana barera abana, cyangwa umwana akurura abantu bakuru, umwana agirira nabi amatungo mu rugo, cyangwa hari urusaku rw'ibirego by'ibinyoma bituruka mu muryango w'umwana, ubu umwana akeneye icyumba cye cyo kuraramo ariko urugo nta mwanya uhagije rufite… urutonde rurakomeza).

Ikindi kibazo cyatuma umwana akurwa mu rugo nta bimenyetso bifatika gishobora kuba ari uko ibintu byageze kuri 310 bitagera ku rwego rwo "guhohoterwa/kwirengagiza", ariko biteye impungenge cyane. Bishobora kuba ari ukwica amategeko agenga uburenganzira bw'umwana, cyangwa se bikaba ari ukwica amategeko agenga uburenganzira bw'umwana mu buryo bukabije (ibi bishobora kuba birimo, ariko ntibigarukira gusa kuri: nta gukomeretsa cyangwa gukomeretsa umwana, ahubwo umubyeyi urera umwana yamukubise urushyi, amukubita, cyangwa amukoresha umukandara, cyangwa se amutesha agaciro mu magambo).

Ese hari uburyo bwo gukuraho iyo 310 ishingiye ku bimenyetso? Akenshi, ariko hari ibintu bidakunze kubaho aho aho hantu hashobora kudakurwaho, bitewe n'ubwoko bw'ihohoterwa. Birashoboka ko gukomereka ku bw'impanuka, gutinda gufata umwanzuro by'akanya gato, cyangwa kwirengagiza bishobora gutuma umwana aguma mu rugo ariko ikigo gikoresha gahunda y'umutekano na gahunda yo gukosora hamwe na serivisi nko kugisha inama, kugenzura cyane, amahugurwa, nibindi.

Ese inzu y’abana igomba gufunga uruhushya rwayo niba 310 ifitiwe ishingiro? Nk’uko ikibazo cya mbere cyavuzwe haruguru gikunze kugaragara, ariko akenshi bidasanzwe. Byaterwa n’imimerere kandi byasaba isesengura ryimbitse no gusuzuma ibirego n’ibyavuye mu bushakashatsi. Hanyuma, ikigo cyagombye gukusanya ibimenyetso no gutanga icyifuzo cyo kureka gusuzuma amateka y’inzu na DCS kugira ngo yemeze gukomeza gutanga uruhushya rwo gukomeza urugo. Hari igihe uruhushya rukurwaho bitewe n’ibikorwa by’umwe mu babyeyi barera, undi akaba ari umwere. Niba baratandukanye cyangwa bagatandukana mu gihe kizaza kandi umubyeyi w’umwere agashaka kugaruka, ibyo bishobora kuba bishoboka.

Ese hari inzira yo kujurira? Yego, irahari; muri rusange, iyo raporo yujujwe kandi yemejwe, mu minsi 15, DCS igomba kohereza ifishi ya "Itangazo ry'uko umuntu aboneka" cyangwa ifishi ya "Itangazo ry'Ishingiro". Iyo itanzweho ishingiro, itangazo rizaba rikubiyemo amakuru ku burenganzira bw'umuntu bwo gusaba Ubujurire bw'Ubutegetsi (ifishi yo gusaba Ubujurire bw'Ubutegetsi ishobora gushyirwa hamwe n'itangazo). Ifishi yo gusaba igomba gutangwa mu minsi 30 uhereye ku itariki raporo yatanzweho, bitabaye ibyo uwakoze icyaha agatakaza uburenganzira bwe bwo kujurira kandi ishingiro rirakomeza. Iyo ubusabe bwakiriwe n'Umujyanama Mukuru wa DCS, uwasabye azamenyeshwa itariki, isaha n'aho iburanisha ry'ubutegetsi ribera. Kuri iyo ngingo, umunyamategeko ashobora kuba ingirakamaro, ariko ntabwo ari ngombwa.

Byongeye kandi, hariho inzira y’amategeko/urukiko mu gihe ukurikiranwaho iperereza (ukekwaho kuba uwakoze icyaha), ashobora gusaba urukiko gukuraho inyandiko muri sisitemu. Iki ni igikorwa kigoye kandi ubufasha bw’umunyamategeko bwaba bwiza.

Ndabizi ko aya ari amakuru menshi yo kukubwira, bityo tuzashyiraho umurongo w'ikibazo muri iki kiganiro ubu ngubu. Ariko ubutaha nzaguha inama zagufasha gutekereza ku buryo bwo kwirinda kugira ngo urinde 310 guhamagara (menya neza ko nta cyizere cy'uko bitazabaho, ariko hari ibintu ushobora gukora kugira ngo ubikumire).

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – DCS Investigations: Possible Investigation Outcomes appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Rero iyo telefoni 310 imaze guhamagarwa kuri telefoni, igikorwa gitangirana no gukusanya amakuru kugira ngo hamenyekane umutekano w'umwana. Ubwa mbere, hakorwa raporo yo kwandika ibirego. Iyi ni yo nyandiko y'ibanze kandi ifasha DCS mu kwemeza niba hakenewe iperereza ryuzuye cyangwa "isuzuma". Imyirondoro y'umuntu uhamagaye kuri telefoni ikomeza kuba ibanga, nubwo abanyamakuru bashishikarizwa gutanga amakuru yabo yo kubahamagara, bityo DCS ishobora gukurikirana nyuma niba ifite ibindi bibazo; icyakora umuntu cyangwa abantu bahamagawe ntibazamenya umwirondoro w'umunyamakuru. Ariko, ukurikije icyo kirego ari cyo, ushobora kumenya uwayihamagaye.

Iyo raporo ya 310 imaze gukorwa, DCS ikora iperereza ry’ibanze kugira ngo imenye niba ibirego byujuje ibisabwa ku ihohoterwa cyangwa kutitabwaho kw’umwana, cyangwa niba "bigiye gusuzumwa" (bivuze ko bitujuje ibisabwa kugira ngo hakorwe iperereza ryimbitse. Byongeye kandi, muri iki gihe, DCS izamenya uburyo iperereza rizatangira vuba - vuba cyane nk'igihe cy'isaha imwe nyuma y'uko raporo ikozwe, kugeza ku minsi 5 ntarengwa. Ibi bishingiye ku buremere bw'ibirego n'akaga umwana yibwira ko arimo.

Iyo byagaragaye ko iperereza rizakomeza kandi ritagenzurwa, akazi k'umushakashatsi ni ugukusanya amakuru gusa. Ibi bivuze ko hazaba ibiganiro bitandukanye kugira ngo hamenyekane neza ibyabaye n'uko umwana ari mu kaga. Umushakashatsi azasura urugo rw'umwana, aganire n'umwana (niba bishoboka), kandi aganirize abandi bashobora kuba hafi y'ikibazo; ibi bishobora kuba birimo ababyeyi, abavandimwe, abarimu, abavandimwe, abaturanyi, inshuti cyangwa abaganga gusa, ariko ntibigomba kuba ari ngombwa. Muri iki cyiciro cy'ibikorwa, byose ni ugusobanukirwa ibyagiye biba mu buzima bw'umwana kugeza ku ngingo kandi niba afite umutekano. Kandi kuri wowe nk'umubyeyi urera umwana, bishobora kuba bivuze ibiganiro byinshi. Nk'uko umushakashatsi yumva ikintu kivuye ku muntu umwe, hashobora kubaho gukurikiranwa n'undi. Nubwo bigoye, gerageza kumva no gusubiza ibibazo gusa. Vuga ukuri ariko ntuvuge byinshi ku bisubizo cyangwa ngo utange andi makuru atari yabajijwe; rimwe na rimwe ibi bishobora kumvikana nabi no gukurura amazi yamaze kuba menshi.

Menya kandi ko DCS ifite uburenganzira bwo (kandi birashoboka cyane ko izakora) igenzura ry’inzu yawe, nubwo ibirego bitabaye mu nzu yawe. Umushakashatsi azagenzura ko ufite ubushyuhe (niba ari mu gihe cy'itumba) ndetse n'umwuka cyangwa umuyaga mu mpeshyi. Bazagenzura ko firigo yawe n'ububiko bifite ibiryo bihagije. Bazagenzura ko ufite amazi atemba. Bazagenzura aho umwana aryama (ese afite uburiri bwe bwite, niba afite umwanya umukwiriye, nibindi). Hari ibindi bintu umugenzuzi ku giti cye ashobora gusaba kureba, hashingiwe ku birego; ndagushishikariza kubyubahiriza gusa, kuko kwanga bishobora gusa nkaho ugerageza guhisha ikintu kandi ibi ntibizaguhira neza cyangwa abana urera. Ushobora guhura n'ibindi birego muri 310 kandi abana (ndetse n'abo wabyaye cyangwa abo warezwe) bashobora gukurwa kuri wewe.

Icyo bahisemo kureba cyose, menya gusa ko bazagifata amafoto. Ndabizi ko ibi bisa n'ibiteye ubwoba kandi ndabyemera, ndababaye cyane, nanjye ubwanjye narabyiboneye, ariko uko urushaho kubahiriza amategeko, niko ibintu bikwiye kugenda neza. Ariko komeza ibi: igikorwa cy'iperereza kigomba gufungwa mu minsi 45. Niba atari ko bimeze, ndagushishikariza gutangira guhamagara kugira ngo umenye impamvu hari gutinda n'igihe byitezwe ko bifungwa. Niba bibaye ngombwa, hamagara umuyobozi w'umugenzuzi.

Iyo iperereza rirangiye kandi ritanzwe, ufite uburenganzira bwo kubona kopi yaryo. Uko mbibona, ntabwo rizakoherezwa ako kanya; uzagomba gusaba byemewe. Ubusabe bunyura ku biro bya DCS by'akarere kakoze iperereza, maze bakakoherereza kopi yawe yahinduwe binyuze mu iposita mu byumweru bibiri.

Hari ikindi kintu nifuza kuvuga, kandi nzagishyira hano kuko ntashoboye kubona ahantu hasobanutse ho kugishyiraho: mu gihe hari iperereza ryakozwe kuri 310 ku nzu yawe, ntushobora gufata indi myanya; ibi bivuze ko uri mu gihe cyo gufungwa by'agateganyo.

Mu nyandiko itaha hazagaragaramo ibisubizo bishoboka by'iperereza.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – DCS Investigations: General Investigation Process appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Sinitaye ku gihe umaze urera umwana, ariko ndahamya ko hari igihe wigeze kwigereranya n'ubushobozi bwawe nk'umubyeyi urera abandi. Wenda wabikoze mu buryo bwiza, nko kuvuga uti “Wow, babyitwayemo nk'uko nanjye mbitekereza kandi reba ukuntu byagenze neza!”

Ariko niba uri nkanjye na gato, wigereranije mu buryo busuzuguritse kandi ntabwo wavuyemo wiyumva nk'aho uri mwiza. Dore urugero rwanjye nahaye umwanya munini mu mutwe wanjye: “Numva mfite ubusazi n'ihungabana, kandi ubuzima buragoye cyane mu rugo rwanjye… kandi mfite umwana umwe gusa wo mu kigo cyita ku bana. Indi miryango ibigenza ite?!?”

Ese ni byiza ko nigereranya n'abandi nk'aba? Ese nabwira undi muntu wambwiye ibyo ko afite ukuri ko atekereza atyo, cyangwa ko agomba kureka kwigereranya n'abandi?

Kugira ngo nsubize icyo kibazo, ndababwira gato ku mateka yacu mu bijyanye n’irerero. Ishuri rya mbere twahawe ryari abakobwa babiri, kandi byari byinshi cyane. Maze igihe kinini mbitekerezaho kandi numva ko iyo tuza kuba dufite umwe muri bo gusa, twari kuba twaratsinze. Niba warasomye inyandiko yanjye mu bihe byashize, usanzwe ubizi, ariko twagombaga guhagarika iryo shuri kuko ryari rirenze urugero.

Nyuma y'imyaka mike. Nyuma y'uko umuhungu wacu muto arezwe, twafashe indi myanya y'umwana uruhuka cyane kurusha abandi bose. Yari umuntu ukunda cyane ariko umuhungu wacu warezwe ntiyashoboraga kwihanganira kumubona. Byari byinshi cyane, bityo twimuriye iyo myanya myiza. Ndavuga ibi byose kuko, niba mvuga ukuri (kandi ni cyo waje hano, sibyo?), hashize imyaka 8 ibyo bibaye kandi NDACYEREKEYE imiryango minini ifite abana barezwe n'abarezwe maze nkibaza nti “Kuki ntashobora kubikora? Kuki ntashobora kubyitwaramo? Ni gute bafite uburyo bwinshi bwo kundusha?”

Ariko, mu rwego rwo kureka iyo gereranya ribi, narabitekerejeho kandi nizera ko ikigaragara ari uko ntazi inkuru yabo. Sinzi ibiri kuba mu ngo zabo. Sinzi uko abana babo bari bameze n'ubuhanga bakuyemo cyangwa bafite mbere. Sinzi ko buri wese atera imbere, sinzi uko abana be basuzuma indwara cyangwa ibibazo cyangwa ingorane, kandi mu by'ukuri, umwana wanjye ni umuntu ukomeye gusa. Kandi nzi neza ko atari buri wese urera abana be indwara nk'iyo mu rugo rwabo nkanjye.

Birumvikana ko sinzi neza, ariko mu by'ukuri hari igihe aba ameze nk'abana batanu; ikibazo cyo kudakora neza kigenda vuba kandi kenshi, ku buryo urugo rwose rwagenzurwa gusa iyo tugira abandi bana bakomoka mu turere dukomeye. Mu by'ukuri, nta bandi bana dufite bakomoka mu turere dukomeye ariko rimwe na rimwe urugo ruhura n'ikibazo cyo kudakora neza rimwe na rimwe ari we wenyine.

Rero ndavuga ibi byose kugira ngo nkubwire: ntukigereranye n'abandi babyeyi barera abana n'abarera abana. Kora ibyo ushoboye, kandi ukore uko ushoboye kose - nibyo byonyine ushobora gukora. Kugereranya ntacyo bikumariye. Bishobora kugusiga wumva ubabaye, ucitse intege, ucitse intege, utishimye, cyangwa utishimye (kandi nzi neza ko nabibonye byose). Ariko nta na kimwe muri ibyo cyagirira akamaro uwo ari we wese. Kandi ntabwo bizagufasha kuba umubyeyi mwiza w'abana.

Nubwo ubutumwa bwanjye ari bugufi uyu munsi, nifuzaga kubushyira ahagaragara mu gihe hari undi muntu uhanganye n'ikibazo cyo kugereranya. Nanone, ibi bishobora kuba ari amagambo asanzwe, ariko ndabivuga uko byagenda kose: niba uhangayikishijwe n'uko udakora ibintu neza, birashoboka ko mu by'ukuri ukora akazi keza ku bijyanye n'ihungabana witayeho buri munsi.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – Quit Your Comparisons appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Ariko nasanze, nkuko nateye intambwe inyuma nkagerageza kunkorera ibintu gusa, ko ari ngombwa. Nabikozeho ku zindi nyandiko, ariko ndumva byemeza ko byongeye gusubirwamo: biroroshye cyane kubura igihe uri murugendo rwo kurera no kurera. Nibura byari kuri njye. Nari napfunyitse mugerageza gukosora / gufasha umwana wanjye kuburyo nataye ubwenge no kubona uwo ndiwe nibyo nishimiye.

Nakundaga gukora ubukorikori no gufata aerobics no gusoma. Noneho namaze gucengera muri iyi si, ibyinshi byarahagaze. Numvaga ntashobora gusobanura igihe kuko mugihe ntarinzi umwana wahahamutse, nagombaga gukora ibindi bintu kugirango inzu ikomeze. Nakuriye mu rugo rufite isuku kandi rufite isuku kandi numvaga aribyo byari byitezwe buriwese. Kandi byari ibyiringiro nari mfite kuri njye ubwanjye. Natekerezaga ko ngomba guteka ifunguro rya nimugoroba buri joro, nkumva nicira urubanza iyo njugunye muri pizza ikonje.

Sinzi niba ari igihe cyashize, icyerekezo, cyangwa ko naniwe rwose… ariko amaherezo nasanze nkeneye kongera kwibona. Kandi sinzi niba aribyo rwose kwiyitaho, ariko ni kubwanjye.

Bimwe muribi bishobora kumvikana nawe kandi bimwe ntibishobora, ariko dore icyitegererezo cyimpinduka nagize mumyaka yashize kandi kubwibyo, ndumva naribohoye cyane kandi nkanjye. Kandi namenye kandi ko umuryango wanjye utababara kuko nanjye niyitaho. Mubyukuri, birashoboka ko bakora neza kuko ntabwo buri gihe ngerageza kubakorera byose.

Noneho, dore urutonde rwanjye rwahindutse, muburyo butandukanye:

• Nabonye imbwa y'ibiro 70 igomba kugenda inshuro 3 kugeza kuri 4 kumunsi kugirango mbone gusohoka no gukora imyitozo n'umwuka mwiza.
• Naguze ikanzu iremereye yo kwambara mugihe ngenda imbwa. Kandi rimwe na rimwe hafi yinzu. Nasanze bifasha rwose kuntegeka, cyane cyane iyo mbonye urwo rugendo rwa mbere mugitondo.
• byuka nk'isaha imwe mbere yuko abandi bose murugo. Nambaye imyenda. Mfite ikawa. Mfite umwanya utuje kandi nkora gusoma. Ndashobora no kubona ifunguro rya nimugoroba. Nibyiza kuri njye kubona inzu kuri njye… kuko ibyo ntibibaho cyane.
• Niba nsohotse mu nama nimugoroba, ntabwo buri gihe numva nshaka gusangira umuryango wanjye. Hashobora kubaho ibisigisigi cyangwa ntibishobora. Nshobora kubaha amahitamo y'ibyo bashobora gukosora cyangwa nkababwira buri wese wenyine.
• Mfata umwanya wo gusoma igitabo hafi buri munsi. Nkubu iyi nyandiko, nasomye ibitabo 75 uyu mwaka. Nakundaga gusoma kandi buri gihe numvaga nicira urubanza igihe nafataga umwanya, ariko uyumwaka, nahisemo ko ntazabyicira urubanza.
• Ndishyura make yinyongera kugirango nkore ibiribwa. Ndabizi mugihe kirekire, birashoboka ko nzigama amafaranga kuko ntabwo mfata impulse zose zigura kandi biroroshye cyane. Byongeye kandi nshobora kohereza umuhungu wanjye mukuru uba murugo kuri pickup nibikenewe.
• Natangiye guhinga, nsanga ndabikunda, kandi nagiye nkora ibishoboka kugirango nzigame imbeho.

Nkuko nabivuze, urutonde rwawe rushobora kuba rutandukanye cyane nuwanjye kandi nibyiza rwose. Nkuko nabivuze, abantu bamwe ntibashobora gutekereza kuri uku kwiyitaho, ariko byibuze ni ukugerageza gushaka inzira yanjye kuri njye, kandi birashoboka ko ushobora no kwisanga munzira.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – Self Care (Kind of) appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Ntabwo ntekereza ko yabikoze nkana, ahubwo yarayirinze kuko byari ibintu bitoroshye; kuba mucyo rwose, mubyukuri sinari nzi kubyegera ntamututse. Ibyo ni bimwe mu bintu bavuze mu kiganiro: vugisha ukuri, ariko wirinde gusebanya. Kandi, ntukarimbishe inkuru kandi utume umuryango winkomoko yumvikana neza, kubwimpamvu zigaragara, kuko ibyo bizatuma umwana yitiranya impamvu bakuweho cyangwa bashyizwe mubakira.

Ibyo byose bivuze, Nahamijwe cyane ko nkeneye gukosora iki kibazo; umuhungu wanjye afite imyaka 11 kandi asoza "kumenya amateka ye yose mugihe afite imyaka 12". Nashimye bidasanzwe igitekerezo cyo guta amabuye; nyuma yigihe kinini cyo Kutaganira kuri papa wabyaye, nari nzi ko bishobora gutungura umuhungu wanjye ko namureze. Igitangaje, giteye urujijo, kibabaza… Nari nzi ko ibyo byose bishoboka, nuko nari narabyirinze.

Ariko nari nzi kandi ko hagiye kubaho ibindi bibazo biza munzira zanjye bitewe nubuzima bwubuzima bwa mama wavutse, kandi nari nkeneye gushiraho urufatiro nkuramo inkuru yose hanze. Kandi nubwo byari bitorohewe bidasanzwe, nashimye abavuga ko bampaye igikoresho gikomeye cyo gukoresha, nubwo ntari nabisabye. Kandi nzi ko utagomba kumbaza byanze bikunze ibyo navuze cyangwa uko byagenze, ariko ndashaka gusangira ubunararibonye bwanjye kugirango nguhe ikizere cyo kugerageza guterera amabuye wenyine.

Nateguye guta amabuye yanjye kugirango tuzabe mugihe twakoraga urujijo rwa jigsaw… nuko twegerana ariko ntitureba; Njye mbona bifasha mugihe ingingo igoye irimo kuganirwaho. (Nzi ko ibyo ari bike ariko nshaka kubivuga mugihe bifasha undi muntu mubihe bisa.)

Kugira ngo ikiganiro (cyangwa icyo nizeraga ko kizaba ikiganiro) cyatangiye, najugunye aya mabuye nti: "Ndibaza niba warigeze utekereza impamvu uri muremure cyane. Mama wawe ni muto kuburyo nibaza aho ukura uburebure bwawe."

Umuhungu wanjye aramusubiza ati: “Kuki ubivuze?”

Navuze nti: "Nibyo, uzi uburyo twarazwe imico yacu mumiryango yacu yavutse kandi kubera ko nyoko wawe atari muremure, nibaza impamvu uzaba muremure… nibaza niba nawe wigeze ubitekereza."

Yahise yihutira kuvuga oya, ko atigeze abitekerezaho (byavugishije ukuri byatumye ntekereza ko YARABIKOREYE, mu byukuri, yabitekerejeho… ariko kubera ko mbere tutigeze tuganira kuri papa wavutse, numvise niba yarankuyeho ibimenyetso avuga ko ari ingingo tutigeze tuvuga ku buryo atashakaga kwemera ko YAMutekereje). Ariko nanone… ntabwo yahinduye ingingo, kandi ntabwo yavuye mucyumba kandi ntiyigeze arakara… nuko mfata nk'ikimenyetso cy'uko ashaka amakuru menshi ariko adashaka kubaza.

Nahise rero nerekeza mu gace tutigeze twinjiramo kandi dusangira bike mubyo nari nzi… ndabisiga aho. Ntakibazo yabajije kandi nta yandi makuru natanze. Gusa twakomeje gukora kuri puzzle yacu hanyuma ntangira kuvuga kubintu bitandukanye rwose.

Mu byumweru bike biri imbere, nagize andi mahirwe yo guta amabuye menshi no gusangira inkuru nyinshi. Njye kuri njye (kandi birashobora kuba umuhungu wanjye gusa, ndabimenye) ariko mumuha inkuru nkeya icyarimwe, afite umwanya wo gusya / gutunganya hanyuma tugasangira byinshi. Kubitanga byose byaba ari byinshi kandi bidahwitse, biragaragara ko arikintu tugerageza kwirinda niba bishoboka.

Biragaragara ko imimerere yawe ishobora kuba itandukanye cyane niyanjye. Birashoboka ko wakoze akazi keza ko gusangira inkuru nyinshi ariko ugomba gutanga amakuru yanyuma. Cyangwa birashoboka ko mutigeze musangira ikintu kubwimpamvu imwe cyangwa indi. Ariko ndashaka ko mwese mumenya ko ari ngombwa kwinjiza inkuru yumwana wawe mumaboko yabo kugirango bashobore kuyirwanya hanyuma batangire gukira byimazeyo.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – Telling Your Child Their Story (Part 2) appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Noneho kugira ngo ndenganure, ntabwo byari biteye ubwoba (hari ibyobo byinshi birenze ibyo nashakaga kubyemera), kandi byari bikosowe rwose kuko ntari narabeshye; Nari nkeneye cyane gusohora amakuru arambuye. Muri rusange rero nari nsigaranye byinshi byo kuvuga. Kandi birashoboka ko nawe wabikora.

Nzi neza ko benshi muri twe bumvise ko ubwumvikane rusange bwinzobere buvuga ko abana bagomba kumenya amateka yabo yose mugihe bafite imyaka 12. Noneho ndashaka guhagarara hariya nkavuga neza gusa niba umwana azabasha kubyitwaramo. Niba ari imikorere mike cyane cyangwa ni amarangamutima cyane, muto cyane, sinzi ko 12 igomba kuba itegeko rikomeye kandi ryihuse. Kugira ngo byumvikane neza, abadamu bayobora amahugurwa ntibabivuze, ariko uyu ni njye ndimo guhuza ibitekerezo byanjye bitari umwuga (ariko byabayeho-uburambe).

Noneho kubera ko yari amahugurwa adasanzwe, ndashaka kubagezaho bimwe mubindi baganiriye. Mbere na mbere, bemeza ko bitoroheye kubabyeyi barera cyangwa barera KANDI kumwana. Ku buryo inshuro nyinshi bitigera bizanwa kuko buriwese atamerewe neza. Ingingo yabo rero mumahugurwa yari iyi: niba umwana atabizana, bireba nkumuntu mukuru (igisonga cyinkuru), kugirango ube uwo "guta amabuye".

None ibyo bivuze iki? “Tera amabuye”? Ahanini ni uguta ibitekerezo bike kubyerekeye umwana wawe mugihe bifitanye isano numuryango wabo wavutse ukareba niba umwana azitabira ibiganiro. Kurugero: "Ufite amaso meza ya hazel. Ndibaza ninde wundi mumuryango ukomokamo ufite amaso ya hazel." Ntabwo wigeze ubaza ikibazo, wakoze gusa indorerezi hanyuma wicara kugirango utegereze urebe niba umwana azasezerana. Umwana arashobora gusubiza igitekerezo cyangwa ikibazo kijyanye n'amaso yabo cyangwa kubintu bitandukanye rwose numuryango bakomokamo. Cyangwa barashobora guhindura ingingo rwose.

Kandi buri umwe muribo ameze neza rwose kuko iyi myitozo ntabwo ari myinshi kugirango utangire ikiganiro (nubwo bishobora kuba byiza uramutse ubikoze), ariko ahanini ni ukwereka umwana ko utekereza kumuryango wabo wavutse. Urashobora gukeka ko bishoboka cyane, nabo, ariko ntibazi kukuzanira; umwana afite amarangamutima menshi avanze kubijyanye (birumvikana!) Ariko muguterera amabuye, uba werekanye ko uri ahantu hizewe ho kuganira kumiryango bakomokamo.

Imwe mu zindi ngingo zivuye mu kiganiro ni uko ugomba kuba umunyakuri rwose. Ntugashushanye kandi ntusige ibisobanuro… nubwo rwose bigoye; gusa iyo hariho ukuri umwana ashobora gutangira gutera imbere akira. Biragaragara ko bitazabaho ako kanya, ariko niba basigaye bibaza ku nkuru zabo, cyangwa niba hari icyuho mu nkuru, bazuzuza amakuru yabo bwite bishoboka cyane ko atari ukuri.

Kandi, ntutinye kuvuga ko utazi igisubizo. Birashoboka cyane mugihe runaka hazabaho ibibazo utazi igisubizo cyacyo. Birashoboka ko ntawe uzi igisubizo. Ntutinye rero kwicara muri ibyo hamwe numwana wawe.

Ingingo ya nyuma batanze ni uko niba utazi igisubizo, menya ko bishoboka cyane ko ukeneye gushaka undi muntu… wenda umuntu wigeze guhura nurugendo nk'urwo ku mwana wawe. Ariko iri imbere yumwana wawe murugendo kandi arimo gukora uko ashoboye kugirango akire. Uyu muntu azumva umwana wawe muburyo udashobora kuko nabo bahuye nabyo. Kandi uyu muntu arashobora kubona no kwemeza umwana wawe muburyo udashobora. Ntabwo ari ukubera ko utagerageza, ntabwo ari ukubera ko udakunda umwana wawe, ahubwo ni ukubera ko udashobora na rimwe gusobanukirwa neza ibyiyumvo byumwana wawe ninkuru muburyo uyu muntu ashobora kubikora. Kandi ibi bizafasha umwana wawe gukira kwe.

Inshuro nyinshi kubana barera cyangwa barera, usanga hari isoni nyinshi kuberako batabana numuryango wabo. Biragaragara ko ibi bihe byaje nta kosa ry'umwana, ariko haracyari byinshi byo gukora. Mugusangiza nabo inkuru zabo zose no kubemerera guhangana nukuri kwukuri, gusa nibwo barashobora kuririra ibyo batakaje byose hanyuma bakiteza imbere bakira.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – Telling Your Child their Story appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Noneho nzaba uwambere kwemeza ko ntigeze ngira toni yo gutsinda kugirango umwana wanjye agure rwose gukora imirimo myinshi. Ariko akora bimwe, kandi rwose byaramufashije. Yaba abyemera cyangwa atabyemera, ikigaragara ni uko akazi gakomeye gatanga umuvuduko mwinshi ku mitsi imufasha mu rugamba rwo gutunganya ibyiyumvo, gutegura moteri, ndetse n'ubushobozi bwo kwibanda.

Kandi nubwo duharanira gukora imirimo yacu iremereye, numvise bavuga kubandi bantu bagize amahirwe kubintu nkibi. Kurugero, Nzi umubyeyi ukunda umwana we kwimura umutwaro winkwi hejuru yikibuga mbere yuko yinjira munzu nyuma yishuri. Hanyuma bukeye bwaho, ayisubiza inyuma aho yari ari.

Ndatahura (kandi nawe arabikora) ko bisa nkibidasanzwe ariko arabyishimira… cyane cyane amaze kumenya ko bimufasha. Nshobora kuba ndimo ndasimbuka mubitekerezo byanjye, ariko usibye akazi karemereye, ibi binamuha umwanya wo gucika intege, ndetse bikamuha umwanya hanze hanze yumuyaga mwiza nizuba.

Ariko kuri benshi muri twe, birashoboka ko dushaka ibitekerezo bisanzwe (kandi birashoboka ko byoroshye gucengera) ibitekerezo. Hano rero hari bike nabashyize hamwe kubwanyu, muburyo butandukanye:

• kwiruka
• gukina gufata (hamwe numupira uremereye nibyiza!)
• gusimbuka kuri trampoline
• gukina hop-scotch
• umugozi wo gusimbuka
• inkende
• kuzamuka ku bikoresho byo gukiniraho
• gutwara igare
• gutwara ikinyabiziga kidafite amashanyarazi
• koga (kuva ku kibaho cyo kwibira ni byiza cyane, nanone kwibira hasi kugirango ukusanye ibikinisho cyangwa ibiceri)
• urubura
• gucukura umucanga
• amababi
• gukora gusunika (hasi cyangwa kurukuta)
• gutwara uburemere buke bw'intoki cyangwa kwambara uburemere bw'amaguru
• gutwara ikiringiti kiremereye
• kuvomera ibihingwa hamwe no kuvomera
• gutwara ibiribwa
• gukurura umuntu kuri sikeli (biragaragara ko mugihe cy'itumba hamwe na shelegi byakoroha, ariko ahantu nyakatsi hibyatsi nabyo byakora)
• gukurura igare
• gusunika amagare
• gusunika igare
• vacuuming
• gutwara igitebo cyuzuye cyo kumesa
• mopping
• guswera
• gukurura cyangwa gukata imigati
• kwimura ibikoresho
• gutondekanya ibitabo ku gipangu
• gukina no gukina ifu cyangwa gushira
• kurwana (ndetse ndatinda kubivuga kuko bishobora kuzamura sisitemu yumutima… koresha rero ibitekerezo byawe!)

Hariho ubundi buryo bwinshi bwo gutuma umwana wawe akora akazi gakomeye muminsi yabo; reba hirya no hino urebe ibintu basanzwe bishimira kandi ubyungukiremo.

Ndabizi ko bisa nkaho nongeyeho ku isahani yawe isanzwe ihuze cyane nkugira inama yo kongeramo ibi, ariko ndashaka kugutera inkunga ko niba umwana wawe arwana no kumenya "aho umubiri wabo ufitanye isano nabandi", umwanya wo gukora akazi gakomeye ugomba kuba uwambere. Niba ubikora, nagira ngo nkeke gukeka ko uzabona ko badakeneye kubona icyo gitekerezo basimbuka ibikoresho hanyuma bagonga abantu.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – The Power of Heavy Work appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Kandi, ndatahura ko amazi ashobora kuba imbarutso kumwana wawe, cyane cyane niba hari ihohoterwa ryabaye ririmo amazi / kwiyuhagira, biragaragara rero ko ugomba gusuzuma ibintu bizakorwa murugo rwawe. Ariko kuri kiddo yanjye, amazi yose yabaye meza.

None, kuki amazi akora kugirango afashe kurwanya dysregulation? Nibyiza, ndizera ko bisa no kuba hanze. Amazi ni ibintu bisanzwe kandi kuba uhuye nayo (cyangwa uyinjizemo), wakwitega ko uzabona ibisubizo nkibyo kuba hanze. Njye kubwanjye ndizera ko biri mubituma ubwiherero bunini bwo mu busitani hamwe na serwakira bikundwa nkuko bisanzwe; iyo numvise abandi bavuga kubyishimira kunywa, bahora bashaka ko bibafasha kuruhuka. Birumvikana, sibyo?

None, ni ubuhe buryo bumwe kiddo yanjye yishimira amazi? Icyambere, uyu mwana akunda koga. Mbere yuko twimuka hashize imyaka ibiri, twari dufite pisine yabaturanyi kandi twahabaye hafi buri munsi mugihe cyicyumweru. Ntabwo twagiye muri wikendi kuko yari yuzuyemo abantu benshi, ariko twajyaga mubintu byambere mugitondo kuva kuwa mbere kugeza kuwa gatanu kandi inshuro icyenda kuri 10 twari dufite pisine rwose. Muri rusange hari hakonje cyane muri Gicurasi ndetse no muri Kamena, ariko muri Kanama, byumvaga ari amazi yo koga, tutitaye ku gihe cy'umunsi. Rero, isaha imwe cyangwa irenga kumunsi muri pisine byafasha cyane, kabone niyo yaba atagenzuwe; cyane kuburyo nakunze kuyikoresha nkigipimo cyo gukumira.

Ikindi nasanze kimufasha cyane ni ubwogero bwe. Rimwe na rimwe, dushobora no gushyiraho terefone mu nzira kugira ngo adashobora kuyigeraho, tukamureka akareba firime akiri mu kabari. Mubisanzwe dukoresha umunyu wa Epsom kandi wenda igisasu cyo kogeramo cyangwa ubwogero bwa bubble cyangwa amavuta yingenzi cyangwa byose byavuzwe haruguru. Kureka akagira amahitamo kubyo ashaka gushyiramo mubisanzwe bifasha kureshya. Kandi mubisanzwe dufite umwana utuje mugihe asohotse. Twafashe ubwogero hagati yumunsi dusanga bishobora kugira ingaruka zirambye kumunsi wose. Hariho ikintu rwose kijyanye no kwibizwa mumazi.

Noneho amaze gukura, kwiyuhagira ntabwo ari "byiza" kuburyo duhitamo kwiyuhagira. Kandi nubwo bidasa neza, rwose biracyafite inyungu. Na none, ndabigereranya nicyifuzo nkumuntu mukuru, kwiyuhagira nimugoroba nkareka umunsi "ukakaraba".

Ibyo nibitekerezo bimwe bigaragara kandi nzi ko pisine idashobora kukugeraho igihe cyose (nzavuga ko arikintu kimwe nabuze kuva aho twahoze!). None, ni ubuhe buryo bundi buryo?

• Rimwe na rimwe, gusa a tote cyangwa pisine yuzuye amazi n'ibikinisho byo kwiyuhagira irashobora gukora amayeri; ameza yamazi nayo atanga uburambe busa. Amazi akonje kumunsi ushushe ahora aruhura - birashoboka ndetse no guterera mubibarafu kugirango ibintu bikonje cyane. Cyangwa gerageza uhindure ibikinisho bya sponges nini muri tote cyangwa kumeza yamazi. Igikorwa cyo kuzuza no kubisohora birashobora gutanga ibintu byinshi bishimishije. Barashimishije kandi guta. Urashobora kandi gufasha umwana gukina "kurohama cyangwa kureremba" hamwe nibintu byinshi bitarinda amazi biva murugo.
• Imbunda y'imbunda… Nubwo mbona ko ibyo ari bibi, bitewe nurwego rwumwana wa dysregulation. Birashobora kuba umwana wanjye gusa, ariko niba asanzwe arwana bishobora kumushyira kuruhande. Cyangwa niba amygdala ye iyobora, noneho ashobora guhitamo nabi nayo, kubyerekeye uwo akina.
• Ibi bisaba kwitegura, ariko gukonjesha igikono kinini cyuzuye amazi n'ibikinisho bito (NTIBIKUNDA… ntidukeneye umwana guhubuka!). Noneho guha umwana wawe igikinisho "ibikoresho" kugirango yikure ku rubura no gutabara ibikinisho (biragaragara ko ari ibikorwa byo hanze). Ibi byemerera umwana gukina amazi atarinze KUBA mumazi.
• Ibyiza bishaje kuminjagira. Nkeneye kuvuga byinshi?
• Imashini ya trampoline - ubungubu iyi ni ubwoko bwurwego rukurikira, kandi biragaragara ko isaba trampoline. Ariko ubona ibitekerezo byinjira, ubona imyitozo, ubona umwuka mwiza, hamwe namazi. Noneho ushobora kuba uvuga, “Ntabwo nigera mbona trampoline!”, Ariko unyumve. Ntabwo rwose twari umwe muri iyo miryango yarahiye ko tutazigera tubona trampoline, hanyuma hasi hanyuma dore muri Werurwe 2020, twabonye "Covid trampoline"… kubera ko tutashoboraga kujya ahantu hose, dukeneye umuhungu wacu kugira icyo akora. Ndanezerewe kuba ikimanitse hariya! "Imashini ya trampoline" ntabwo, ariko trampoline nigice cyiza rwose kandi urashobora gushiraho imashini iyo ari yo yose iruhande rwayo kugirango ushimishe amazi.
• Kunyerera no kunyerera… Biteje akaga nkuko bishimishije wongeyeho basiga umurongo wimyambarire mu gikari cyawe amezi ari imbere. Ariko niba ubishaka, birashobora kugufasha.
• Shira amakariso - ibi (byibuze muburambe bwanjye) akenshi ni ubuntu, byongeye birashobora gutuma umwana yegera kwibizwa mumazi, ariko ntabwo aribyinshi nka pisine cyangwa kwiyuhagira. Ikintu nkiki gishobora kuba cyiza kuri kiddo ufite ubwoba bwo kwibizwa.
• Hanyuma, parike y'amazi. Mugihe atari ubuntu, kandi mubisanzwe ntabwo bihendutse, rimwe na rimwe niba hari aho ushobora kubona pasiporo yigihe kandi bigatuma igiciro cyawe murugendo ruto cyane. Hano hari ikibuga cyamazi kitari kure yacu gifite igipimo cyihariye amasaha abiri yanyuma buri cyumweru nyuma ya saa sita kuburyo akenshi iyo tujya, ndetse nubu. Kugira ngo bisobanuke neza, iyo mvuze ngo "twe", ndashaka kuvuga ko umugabo wanjye atwara umuhungu wacu kandi sindabona umunota wo guhumeka mbere yo gutangira mucyumweru gitaha ahubwo ni igihe gishimishije cyo guhuza bombi. Ikibuga cyamazi gifite ibyumviro byinshi, umwanya wo hanze, no kwibiza mumazi (niba babishaka). Inshuro nyinshi usanga zeru zinjira muri pisine, kandi hari ahantu hasa nkibishishwa. Mubyukuri ikintu kuri buri wese.

Hariho ubundi buryo bwinshi ushobora gufasha umwana wawe kwishimira imbaraga zamazi, ariko twizere ko hano hari inama zimwe ushobora gukuramo mugihe ubikeneye cyane.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – The Power of Water appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Yarafashije. Nk ,, byarafashijwe rwose! Natangiye rero kubigerageza muburyo butandukanye: ikirere gikonje, ikirere gishyushye, ibihe bishyushye, imvura cyangwa izuba. Byose byarafashije! Kandi ntanubwo bigomba kumara amasaha n'amasaha. Rimwe na rimwe, iminota 15 irahagije kugirango ibintu bihinduke.

Nabonye kandi ko bidakorera abana banjye gusa, byangiriye akamaro. Gufata imbwa gutembera, cyangwa kujya gutembera cyangwa gutwara amagare, kwita ku busitani bwanjye, cyangwa no kwicara hanze… hari ikintu gisubiramo. Ntabwo ngiye kwinjira muburyo bwuzuye bwumwuka, ariko mvugishije ukuri, sinkeka ko twagenewe kumarana umwanya munini murugo nkuko tubikora.

Mubyukuri, ubushakashatsi bwakozwe bwerekanye ko hariho isano no kuba hanze no kugabanuka guhangayika no guhangayika, ibyago byo kwiheba, ndetse no kongera kwibanda no kwibanda.

Ariko biragaragara ko udasoma ibi kugirango umenye ibyanjye nabana banje; ushobora kuba wifuza kumenya niba ibi bikora kubana kuva ihahamuka. Kandi ndi hano kugirango menyeshe ibyo nabonye kuva mubunini bw'icyitegererezo kimwe: byafashije na kiddo yanjye kuva ahantu hakomeye, hamwe na caveat - kuri we, byibura, hanze ifite aho igarukira.

Igice kinini cyibi gifitanye isano nuko uyu mwana afite imisatsi NZIZA nabonye mubuzima bwanjye, kandi rwose ifata ubushyuhe. Nubwo rero ari byiza iyo ari birebire (afite ibibyimba bitangaje nabyo), nko muri Mata, dukora "gukata icyi," kikaba ari intambwe imwe uvuye ku gisirikare cyanjye, kandi ibyo bikamufasha gukomeza gukonja. Niba ntabikora, azashyuha vuba vuba kandi ni umukino urangiye kandi dysregulation ye ishobora kuba (soma: bizaba) kurushaho. Rero, idirishya ryacu kubikorwa byo hanze usanga akenshi ari bike (keretse niba birimo amazi, nzabiganiraho ubutaha.)

Biragaragara ko ntazi ko ibyo bizabera kiddo yawe, ariko ndimo kubikoresha gusa nk'impanuro yo kuburira; mubunararibonye bwanjye, abana bafite ihungabana bafite umurongo muto muri rusange kandi kuba hanze nabyo ntibisanzwe bityo uzakenera guhanga amaso ibintu nkibi kugirango umenye ubushobozi bwa kiddo wawe kwihanganira ubushyuhe.

Kuruhande, umuhungu wanjye AKUNDA imbeho na shelegi kandi akenshi bigaragara ko atambaye neza, ariko na none, kuko akenshi "yiruka ashyushye" ntabwo yumva akonje nubwo haba hakonje.

Urashobora rero kwibaza icyo bagomba gukora hanze. Tuvugishije ukuri, icyo bashaka cyose (mubitekerezo, birumvikana). Ariko hano hari ibitekerezo bike bidahiganwa kugirango ubitekerezeho:

• Gutwara igare cyangwa ikinyabiziga
• Hisha ibituba
• Shushanya na chalk (cyangwa gukora chalk y'amazi hanyuma ushire irangi kumuhanda search gushakisha byihuse google bizakubwira uko wabikora!)
• Simbukira mu byuzi (haba mugihe cyangwa nyuma yimvura)
• Kubaka igihome
• Ishimire ibibuga byaho
• Komeza gutembera kubidukikije cyangwa guhiga ibidukikije (urashobora kubona urutonde rwakozwe mbere kuri Pinterest)
• Kurya ifunguro cyangwa ibiryo hanze
• Kurwanira urubura (cyane cyane birashimishije mugihe cyizuba niba ushobora guteganya mugihe cyitumba ukabika urubura muri firigo yawe. Ndabona ko arikibazo gikomeye kandi sinigeze nshobora kubyibuka ubwanjye, nubwo ndi CERTAIN umuhungu wanjye yabikunda!)
• Kubaka igihome
• Abamarayika b'urubura

Uru biragaragara ko atari urutonde rwuzuye, ariko nashakaga kuguha bike byihuse kandi byoroshye (kandi birashoboka kubuntu cyangwa bihendutse!) Kwari ukubona kiddo idakwiye hanze kandi twizere ko izasubira mumabwiriza.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – The Power of the Outdoors appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.

Mugihe yari murugendo rwe rwo kurera, yarabimenye, kandi nawe ushobora kuba ufite kuko rwose narimfite, mubyukuri nta makuru menshi ahari hano ku bitotsi byamenyeshejwe ihahamuka. Benshi muritwe tumenyereye kwizerwa gushingiye kubufatanye, no kumenyeshwa ihahamuka ryo gusezerana kumanywa. Ariko iyo ugeze ku musozo wumunsi, cyangwa mu gicuku, ukaba unaniwe, Biragoye kuzirikana amahame yawe ya TBRI.

Ku muhungu wacu, igihe yazaga kubana natwe bwa mbere, yararyamye nta kibazo. Nashoboraga kumushira hasi cyane akabona gusinzira wenyine. Ntabwo rwose yagombaga kwikuramo, ntabwo yarize cyangwa ngo atere ubwoba. Yafashe pacifier ye araryama.

Noneho, sinzi neza icyahindutse, cyangwa niba byaratewe nuko twahujije kumanywa mugihe yari akangutse. Nzaba inyangamugayo: Namufashe cyane, nitaye kurira, nibindi (Mumuhe ibyo akeneye kugirango ahuze). Cyangwa niba ari uko yateje imbere kwimenyekanisha, nkuko abana babikora, ariko igihe kimwe ntiyari agishoboye kwisinzira ngo asinzire. Igihe cya Nap muri rusange ntabwo cyari ikibazo, ariko igihe cyo kuryama cyari urugamba rwose.

Nasanze ngomba kuryama hasi hejuru yamasaha abiri nijoro kugirango asinzire. Yagumye mu kabati kugeza afite imyaka ine, irashaje rwose kuba ikiri mu gitanda, ariko yasaga nkaho ayikunda. Ntiyagerageje gusohoka. Mugitondo, yaradusakuzaga gusa agategereza ko tuza kumushaka. Ariko nari nzi kandi niba atisinziriye wenyine, azababara kandi arakaye mu gitanda kandi mfite ubwoba ko azababara. Ntabwo gusa twatekereje ko kwimukira muburiri busanzwe bigiye no gufasha ibintu.

Noneho nkuko ushobora kubyibuka mubyabanjirije, yaje iwacu afite amezi atatu. We rero, kimwe na kiddo benshi baza kwitabwaho, ashobora kuba yarabaye ibintu byababayeho nijoro basinziriye. Cyangwa birashoboka ko yari afite ubwoba bwumwijima, nkuko abana benshi babikora. Nkurikije imyitozo narebye, Allison Ezell (Nzashyiramo umurongo wurubuga rwe hepfo) avuga kubyerekeranye nuko mugihe cyo gusinzira ari gutandukana byoroshye kubana… nkuko bimeze kubana bose, ariko cyane cyane kubarera. Niba kandi baragize ihungabana nijoro, byumvikane ko barwanira kujya kuryama, cyangwa gusinzira, kabone niyo baba bari mubidukikije bifite umutekano.

Nkuko twese tubizi, kubwira umwana bafite umutekano kandi nabo ibyiyumvo umutekano urashobora kuba ibintu bibiri bitandukanye cyane. Ikintu cya mbere rero Allison avuga gukora nukurwanya ubwoba bwigihe cyijoro hamwe na connection. Inama atanga zirimo kongeramo igihe cyo gukina mubikorwa byawe byo kuryama. Yatanze igitekerezo cyo gukina umukino w'amakarita cyangwa umukino w'ikibaho cyangwa ikindi kintu gituje kandi gituje, aho uryamye, mu cyumba cy'umwana. Cyangwa birashobora kuba ari gusoma igitabo cyangwa kugira ibishushanyo by'inyuma - ibintu nkibyo. Kandi ibyo bisa nkibitangaje kandi bihuza.

Nzatanga ibiceri byanjye bibiri hano bidatuje neza ariko hano ni: kimwe mubintu dukora hafi buri joro hamwe numuhungu wacu, kandi afite imyaka 11, ni umukino muto wo kurwana mbere yuko turyama tugasoma kandi tugasoma inyuma. Igice cyibyo bisohora gusa wiggles, ariko kandi bimuha ibyumviro byinjira hamwe no guhuza binyuze kumubiri. Biragaragara ko ibyo bitazaba ibyo buri mwana akeneye; ntibashobora kwifuza gukorwaho na gato, bityo rero kuba umuhanga kumwana wawe, uzamenya ibizabakorera neza. Kandi biragaragara niba ari ahantu hashya ushobora kutamenya ako kanya; birashobora kugutwara gato kugirango umenye ibikorwa cyangwa ibikorwa bimukwiriye. Ndakubwira gusa icyadukorera ni akantu gato ko kugenda ingufu nyinshi mbere.

Noneho ati koresha uburyo runaka bwo gutandukana cyangwa ikintu cyumutekano kugirango ufashe guhuza. Ndetse no gutuma umwana acana nijoro cyangwa imashini yera y urusaku cyangwa ikindi aricyo cyose bakeneye, ubahe izo mbaraga no kugenzura umwanya wabo.

Ibikurikira avuga nukurera mugihe cyo kuryama, ariko kandi agatanga imiterere. Komera kuri gahunda kuko umwana azakora byinshi byiza niba azi icyo ategereje kuri gahunda. Ndashobora guhamya ko ibyo ari ukuri rwose. Niba tuvuye mubyanditswe muburyo ubwo aribwo bwose, mubisanzwe bivuze ko igihe cyo kuryama ari byinshi cyane. Agera kure kugirango atange gahunda igaragara ibereka neza ibizakurikiraho.

Ikintu cya gatatu avuga nukwumva, nkumubyeyi, urufatiro rwibanze rwo gusinzira. Ndetse ashishikariza ababyeyi barera, bashobora kuba bafite abana b'imyaka itandukanye binjira cyangwa basohoka mu rugo, kwigira urupapuro rwabigenewe kugira ngo ugumane mu cyumba cyo kuryama cyangwa muri koridoro kugira ngo umenye neza ko uhuza rwose n’ibitotsi umwana ashobora gukenera. Uru rupapuro rwibeshya rwaba rurimo ibintu nka Windows ikangutse, ibitotsi byinshi umwana akenera kumyaka, ubwinshi bwibitotsi umwana akeneye, ukwezi gusinzira, kurya / gukina / gusinzira, kwitoza gusinzira wenyine, no gusobanukirwa no kuryama hamwe no gusinzira.

Ngiye gusimbukira hano isegonda. Nzi ko ari umuhanga, ariko nkuko nabivuze hejuru, uri umuhanga ku mwana wawe, kuko ndi umuhanga kuri njye. Kandi rero nubwo afite hafi imyaka 11, hari nijoro aho ndara mucyumba cye kugeza igihe asinziriye. Mubisanzwe, nibwo arushye rwose, hanyuma arasinzira mbere yuko ngenda, ariko nyuma yigihe cyo guhuza, n'amatara arazima, ndavuga isengesho numugisha, ibyo nzi ko bitaba kubantu bose, ariko biri mubikorwa byacu rero ndabivuga hano, noneho dushobora kuganira wenda iminota itanu, niba ashishikajwe no kuganira, mubisanzwe ndamureka akabigiramo.

Noneho nzahaguma bitarenze iminota 10 uko atuye kandi neza. Inshuro nyinshi, aracyari maso iyo mvuye mucyumba maze akisinzira. Ariko kuri ubu, yumva ko ankeneye hariya gato. Cyangwa se. Cyangwa mukuru we. (Ariko reka tuvugishe ukuri..ni njye ahanini). Noneho arisinzira wenyine? Igihe kinini. Turacyari mucyiciro cyinzibacyuho? Yego. Turacyakora imyitozo yo gusinzira twigenga? Yego. Kuberako dufite ibyiringiro, kimwe na we, umunsi umwe azatangiza, kandi bizaba bitoroshye niba tugomba kujya iwe buri joro kugirango tumufashe gusinzira lol.

Kubatabizi neza, ibyo byari urwenya, kuko tuzi ko tutazagira umuntu mukuru, ubaho wigenga, ukeneye umuntu wicara iruhande rwe kugirango asinzire buri joro. Ariko hari iminsi bisa nkaho wenda aribyo bizashoboka. Ntabwo rwose tubyizera, ariko ntitwizeraga ko twagira umwana wimyaka 10 1/2 aracyakeneye ko tubaho igihe gito cyane kuruta uko byari bisanzwe mugihe cyo kuryama.

Noneho subira kumwuga: Igikurikira avuga ni uguhungabanya ibitotsi. Hariho ibintu bine by'ingenzi aganira. Ubwa mbere ubwoba bwijoro, busa nkumwana arimo akora inzozi zubwoko runaka, ariko zirasinziriye rwose. Ntibazibuka ibyabaye bukeye bwaho, iyo rero nkumubyeyi wunvise bibaho, uremeza neza ko umwana afite umutekano. Himura ibintu muburyo bwabo, ntukemere gukora ikintu kidafite umutekano, nibindi.

Ubwoko bwa kabiri bwo guhagarika ibitotsi ninzozi mbi, kandi birashobora kuba urugomo cyane kandi biguhungabanya. Umwana azibuka ibyo, nkuko bibaho mubitotsi bya REM, bikora cyane gusinzira no kurota. Ku rundi ruhande, ubwoba bwa nijoro, buri mu ntangiriro zo gusinzira mbere yuko umwana asinzira cyane. Ihungabana rya gatatu ryo gusinzira ni ukuryama - kandi na none, barasinziriye cyane, intego rero kuri wewe ni ukubungabunga umutekano wabo, kubayobora mu buriri bwabo, kandi ntibazabyibuka mu gitondo. Icya kane ni ukuvuga ibitotsi, nabyo ntibizibukwa, kandi kubwinshi ntacyo bitwaye. Nubwo umwana avuza induru, cyangwa avuga ibintu bifitanye isano muri rusange, ibyo bigomba kuvugwa na muganga.

Noneho ikintu cya nyuma yavuze kugirango gifashe ubwonko bwumwana kwitegura gusinzira ni ukureba ibidukikije; harimo ihumure cyangwa ibintu bifasha. Ibi birashobora kubamo, ariko ntibigarukira gusa: ikiringiti kiremereye, imashini y urusaku, amavuta yo kwisiga adasanzwe / impumuro nziza, amatara yijoro. Ikintu kimwe twakoresha kugiti cyacu kuri ibyo bintu byose ni abafana. Muri rusange umuhungu wacu arasinzira cyane. Kandi muri rusange, hafi buri gihe ashyushye kuburyo dufite abafana babiri mubyumba bye. Afite kandi urupapuro rwo guhunika ku buriri bwe. Ibyo ushobora kuba utekereza bimutera gushyuha ariko igitangaje ntabwo bisa nkaho bihindura byinshi. .

Byongeye kandi, dutanga melatonin, ibyo sinkunda, ariko yamubereye impinduka mumikino. By'umwihariko, dukoresha ibintu bibiri bya melatonine, itanga bimwe ako kanya, kandi ibisigaye byo kunywa bitangwa ijoro ryose kugirango akomeze gusinzira. Kandi afata magnesium gummy, nayo ifasha gushyigikira ibitotsi kandi ifasha gutonda umurongo umubiri ko igihe cyo kuruhuka.

Kurangiza, ibindi bitekerezo bike atanga ni ubwogero bwa nijoro, umwenda wijimye mucyumba cyo kuryama, natwe dufite ibyo, kandi ukomeza gucana amatara nyuma yumwijima. Ibyo biroroshye kuvuga kuruta gukora mugihe cyizuba kandi biracyacana saa kumi nijoro, ariko mugice cyiza cyumwaka, byaba byiza imyitozo.

Nzi ko ntari umuhanga hano ariko nashakaga gutanga ibindi bitekerezo kubintu twabonye bifasha; kugenda kuva amasaha 2 (cyangwa arenga) kugirango uryame, kugeza muminota mike (muri rusange) nitsinzi nini mubitekerezo byanjye!

Nkuko nabivuze, nta toni yamakuru kuri interineti cyangwa mubitabo bivuga ku ihahamuka ryamenyeshejwe ko umuntu asinziriye, ku buryo ku giti cyanjye nasanze ibi cyane n’umurabyo, kandi nizere ko nawe uzabikora. Nkuko nabivuze, aya ntabwo ari amakuru yanjye, ahubwo ni ayumwuga. Urubuga rwe, niba wifuza kureba byinshi mumakuru agomba gusangira, ni dwellpediatricsleep.com.

Mubyukuri,

Kris

The post Kris’ Corner – Trauma-Informed Sleep appeared first on Firefly Children and Family Alliance.