{"id":8404,"date":"2020-06-18T14:44:02","date_gmt":"2020-06-18T14:44:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.childrensbureau.org\/?p=8404"},"modified":"2025-02-25T12:06:38","modified_gmt":"2025-02-25T17:06:38","slug":"kris-corner-what-if-i-get-too-attached","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fireflyin.org\/ht\/resources\/news-library\/kris-corner-what-if-i-get-too-attached\/","title":{"rendered":"Kwen Kris - E si mwen vin tw\u00f2 tache?"},"content":{"rendered":"
L\u00e8 m rankontre moun epi diskite sou swen adoptif kesyon ki inevitableman par\u00e8t (menm nan yon konv\u00e8sasyon senk minit pandan m ap travay yon izolwa) se "e si mwen vin tw\u00f2 atache?" Epi pafwa li swiv ak, "Mwen jis pa t 'kapab rem\u00e8t yo."<\/p>\n
Oke, premye, si ou panse ou ta dwe "tw\u00f2 tache," L\u00e8 sa a, ou ta dwe definitivman konsidere vin yon paran adoptif (mwen pral s\u00e8k tounen sou sa nan yon moman). Ak dezy\u00e8m, wi ou ta bay yo tounen. Mwen konnen ke majorite moun yo gen bon entansyon epi yo pa di ke sa pa ta retounen yon timoun bay paran byolojik yo si li te \u00f2done tribinal; yo tou senpleman f\u00e8 yon deklarasyon f\u00f2 vle di ke yo pa ta vle f\u00e8 li epi li ta tr\u00e8 difisil. Mwen konprann sa n\u00e8t. Men, yo ta (epi yo ta ka) f\u00e8 li, menm si li ta dwe.<\/p>\n
Koulye a, kite a atake tout lide pou yo te "tw\u00f2 tache". Si ou panse ke li gen anpil chans pou ou santi w t\u00e8lman pwofondman ak f\u00f2tman sou yon timoun ak swen li, L\u00e8 sa a, ou ta dwe absoliman gade nan vin yon paran adoptif. Ou ka deja imajine sa a, men k\u00f2m yon timoun ap retounen bay paran byolojik, li se ekstr\u00e8mman douloure emosyon\u00e8lman. Epi se pa yon doul\u00e8 ki pral bese byen vit. Oswa pet\u00e8t tout tan. Se la nou jwenn nosyon de "tw\u00f2 tache".<\/p>\n
Men, atachman se egzakteman sa timoun nan swen adoptif bezwen. Anpil fwa, yo pa janm gen yon moun vr\u00e8man atache ak yo, ni yo pa te gen yon moun nan lavi yo ak ki moun yo gen yon atachman an sante. K\u00f2m rezilta, yo pa konnen ki jan yo tache oswa menm montre ke se sa k\u00e8 yo anvi.<\/p>\n
Antanke paran adoptif, se nou menm pou nou jete liy sovtaj sa a bay timoun ki nan swen nou yo; kado atachman an se yon bagay ou ka bay timoun yo ke yo ka pote av\u00e8k yo pou tout r\u00e8s lavi yo ... k\u00e8lkeswa si yo av\u00e8k ou oswa ou pa.<\/p>\n
Mwen te konprann byen bon\u00e8 nan ka pi piti pitit gason nou an ke li te bezwen konnen ke nou renmen l 'epi nou ta pran swen l' jan nou kapab; nan l\u00f2t mo, li te bezwen yo dwe tache. Kidonk, pou nou jwenn atachman sa a, nou te kenbe l tout tan (menmsi li te reziste pou yo kenbe l l\u00e8 li te premye rive). Nou te pale av\u00e8 l, nou te gade l nan je epi nou te souri anpil; nou te konsole l l\u00e8 l te kriye. Apre yon tan, li te aprann pran plezi nan kenbe l; an reyalite, li se kounye a p\u00e8t\u00e8t pi gwo snuggle-bug la ou ta ka janm rankontre. Men, ni plezi li ak konpreyansyon sou konf\u00f2 ak afeksyon se paske li te f\u00e8 lyezon ak nou e li te vin reyalize ke nou te sousye pwofondman pou li; liy anba a, li te tache ... e nou menm tou.<\/p>\n
Nan moman plasman li a (epi pou mwa apre), nou pa t 'konnen li t'ap la av\u00e8k nou pou tout tan, men nou te travay pou kreye atachman ki genyen ant nou paske nou te konnen LI te bezwen li epi gerizon nan ch\u00f2k li a ta s\u00e8lman k\u00f2manse rive. yon fwa nou te gen baz atachman. Menm si timoun yo nan swen adoptif yo pa reyalize ke se bagay ki te manke nan lavi yo, yo konnen yon moun epi yo dwe konpl\u00e8tman konnen pa yon moun se yon gwo bezwen pou nou tout.<\/p>\n
Donk, wi, ou ta ka "tw\u00f2 atache" l\u00e8 k\u00e8 w santi w kraze l\u00e8 yon timoun ap kite kay ou, men tout paran adoptif yo ka rekonesan ak fy\u00e8 d\u00e8ske yo te bay yon timoun kado atachman... yon kado ki ka itilize pou yon timoun. pou tout lavi.<\/p>\n
Sens\u00e8man,<\/p>\n
Kris<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When I meet people and discuss foster care the question that inevitably comes up (even in a five minute conversation while I\u2019m working a booth) is \u201cwhat if I get too attached?\u201d And sometimes it is followed up with, \u201cI just couldn\u2019t give them back.\u201d Well, first, if you think you would be \u201ctoo attached,\u201d […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8404","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-kriss-corner"],"yoast_head":"\n