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Today I want to give you a few methods for improving connection and attachment within your family. There are lots of them out there and this is just a sprinkling. And\u2026to be perfectly honest\u2026these are great to use with almost anyone, not just kids from hard places, so feel free to use anywhere and as often as needed. All kids need bonding, and attachment strengthening activities will never be time wasted.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Slippery Slope<\/span><\/b>\u202fSlippery\u00a0slope is usually done with younger children. In this activity, you put lotion on a child and then you pretend that their leg, arm, feet are slippery\u00a0slippery\u00a0slopes.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Scavenger Hunt<\/span><\/b>\u00a0A scavenger hunt with kids is always lots of fun. There are many you can find online (and this way you can adjust your search to a specific topic or theme or age-level). Regardless of what it involves, a scavenger hunt gives everyone in the family an opportunity to look for things together and work toward a common goal. Just as an example of one my family does every year after Thanksgiving is a Christmas Lights Scavenger Hunt, in which we drive around and search for a whole long list of different kinds of Christmas lights. We actually made up our own list of things to search for, which is yet another activity the family can do together ahead of time.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Shared Painting\/Drawing\/Coloring<\/span><\/b>\u202fThis activity depends on the child, because some children get upset and feel as though others in the family are ruining their project. Point being: prior to embarking on this activity, discuss it with the child and determine if it would work with his temperament.\u202f\u00a0You may already know this one is off the table in your house, or you may not really be sure until you try it. But just a tip: if it does\u00a0\u201cgo South\u201d\u00a0so to speak, be prepared to abandon it and have another project waiting in the wings if at all possible.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n But if you DO think a shared art project would work, here\u2019s kind of the general idea: whatever the project is (painting, coloring or drawing), set up a timer for 1 min, 30 seconds, or whatever the attention span is for the age group.\u202f\u00a0Have each person begin a picture. Once the timer goes off, move the pictures to the left; at this point, that person contributes to that picture in front of them, until the timer goes off. Keep the pictures moving until everyone has drawn\/painted, etc. on each picture and the owners get their pictures back.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Five Quick Questions<\/span><\/b>\u00a0This is a fun\u00a0activity\u00a0to do at dinner\u00a0or in the car,\u00a0or\u00a0cut out\u00a0copies of the questions\u00a0and put into a jar\u00a0to\u00a0play like a game.\u00a0Here are a few to get you started, but you can always make up your own as well:<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Questions to ask kids about themselves:<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Questions to ask kids about their family and friends:<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Questions to ask kids about the world:<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n The\u00a0\u201cYes\u201d\u00a0Jar<\/span><\/b>\u00a0This activity requires some prep work on the part of the parent, but the benefits can definitely outweigh the work. To begin, here\u2019s what you need (feel free to omit anything from the list that you aren\u2019t willing to let your child have every time he asks):<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Once you fill your jar, tell your child about it and be willing to say yes anytime he asks. The point of this activity is that by hearing more\u00a0\u201cyeses\u201d, children from hard places will learn to trust the adults they are with; I know it seems backwards, but actually by saying yes more often,\u00a0we help\u00a0the\u00a0child\u00a0accept our no more easily.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n The Yes Jar does, sometimes, need to have parameters. For instance, the jar might be filled each evening when the child goes to bed and once it is empty the next day, then it\u2019s empty for the rest of that day.\u00a0 Or maybe he can\u2019t ask for anything after dinner, or before dinner or whatever you decide to set as your rules\u2026\u2026but try not to set too many boundaries because then it becomes yet another battleground in your home. The rules are fine, so long as you say\u00a0yes,\u00a0any other time the child asks.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n FYI be prepared at the beginning to spend a little more money on this at first because\u00a0the child will\u00a0ask for something from the jar OFTEN. He wants to see if you will really say\u00a0yes,\u00a0EVERY time, but as he begins to trust that you will really say\u00a0\u201cyes\u201d, you will see the asking slow down.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Just Playing<\/span><\/b>\u00a0This seems so simple but just playing with your kids. Even 5 minutes a day can work to build a healthy connection with\u00a0a\u00a0child. Playing a game, or just playing what he wants to play. Child directed play is great too; it allows for insight into how a\u00a0child thinks, builds trust and helps to exhibit shared power by allowing the child to\u00a0\u201cdirect the ship\u201d.\u00a0\u202f<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n So,\u00a0as I said\u2026this is not a complete or thorough list by any means\u2026simply a list to get you thinking about the ways you connect with your child and how you can use those moments together to bring healing and attachment. And I want to give a huge\u00a0\u201cThank You!\u201d\u00a0To Jamila Nwokorie at Children\u2019s Bureau for all her advice and insight to put together this post.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Sincerely,<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Kris<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Today I want to give you a few methods for improving connection and attachment within your family. There are lots of them out there and this is just a sprinkling. And\u2026to be perfectly honest\u2026these are great to use with almost anyone, not just kids from hard places, so feel free to use anywhere and as […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"Today I want to give you a few methods for improving connection and attachment within your family. There are lots of them out there and this is just a sprinkling. And\u2026to be perfectly honest\u2026these are great to use with almost anyone, not just kids from hard places, so feel free to use anywhere and as often as needed. All kids need bonding, and attachment strengthening activities will never be time wasted.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\r\n\r\nSlippery Slope\u202fSlippery<\/span><\/b>\u00a0slope is usually done with younger children. In this activity, you put lotion on a child and then you pretend that their leg, arm, feet are slippery\u00a0slippery\u00a0slopes.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\r\n\r\nScavenger Hunt<\/span><\/b>\u00a0A scavenger hunt with kids is always lots of fun. There are many you can find online (and this way you can adjust your search to a specific topic or theme or age-level). Regardless of what it involves, a scavenger hunt gives everyone in the family an opportunity to look for things together and work toward a common goal. Just as an example of one my family does every year after Thanksgiving is a Christmas Lights Scavenger Hunt, in which we drive around and search for a whole long list of different kinds of Christmas lights. We actually made up our own list of things to search for, which is yet another activity the family can do together ahead of time.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\r\n\r\nShared Painting\/Drawing\/Coloring<\/span><\/b>\u202fThis activity depends on the child, because some children get upset and feel as though others in the family are ruining their project. Point being: prior to embarking on this activity, discuss it with the child and determine if it would work with his temperament.\u202f\u00a0You may already know this one is off the table in your house, or you may not really be sure until you try it. But just a tip: if it does\u00a0\u201cgo South\u201d\u00a0so to speak, be prepared to abandon it and have another project waiting in the wings if at all possible.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\r\n\r\nBut if you DO think a shared art project would work, here\u2019s kind of the general idea: whatever the project is (painting, coloring or drawing), set up a timer for 1 min, 30 seconds, or whatever the attention span is for the age group.\u202f\u00a0Have each person begin a picture. Once the timer goes off, move the pictures to the left; at this point, that person contributes to that picture in front of them, until the timer goes off. Keep the pictures moving until everyone has drawn\/painted, etc. on each picture and the owners get their pictures back.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\r\n\r\nFive Quick Questions<\/span><\/b>\u00a0This is a fun\u00a0activity\u00a0to do at dinner\u00a0or in the car,\u00a0or\u00a0cut out\u00a0copies of the questions\u00a0and put into a jar\u00a0to\u00a0play like a game.\u00a0Here are a few to get you started, but you can always make up your own as well:<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\r\n\r\nQuestions to ask kids about themselves:<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>\r\n\n
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