{"id":9669,"date":"2021-07-29T21:44:42","date_gmt":"2021-07-29T21:44:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.childrensbureau.org\/?p=9669"},"modified":"2025-02-25T12:05:52","modified_gmt":"2025-02-25T17:05:52","slug":"kris-corner-pats-praise-accolades","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fireflyin.org\/cnh\/resources\/news-library\/kris-corner-pats-praise-accolades\/","title":{"rendered":"Kris’ Corner- Pats, Praise & Accolades"},"content":{"rendered":"

So\u00a0here\u2019s the thing: if you are looking for lots of pats on the back or praise and accolades, being a foster parent (or any job in social work, actually) might not be for you.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>To be fair, it\u2019s not that no one sees what you do or that your time, energy and effort are not noticed\u2026but it\u2019s that the people who notice are often as overwhelmed as you and\u00a0honestly\u00a0they don\u2019t take the time to tell you.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Rest in the knowledge that you\u2019re doing a good job and assume that others notice. You can take comfort in the fact that you\u2019ll hear from someone if they see that there\u2019s a problem; it\u2019s definitely a case of\u00a0\u201cno news is good news\u201d.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>That\u2019s not to say that you\u2019ll never be acknowledged\u2026you definitely will (and I have to say that Children\u2019s Bureau is really fabulous at acknowledging their foster parents!), but not every time you do something really great. It\u2019s kind of like life in general, right?<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Point being\u2026the protection of the child in your care is what truly matters and you, as the foster parent, just keep going, keep doing and keep advocating for the kiddo.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>A couple of foster parents said it this way:<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>\u201cYou will feel over looked,\u00a0underappreciated, and\u00a0sometimes\u00a0treated as if you are clueless. Keep fighting for the kids in spite of this.\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>\u201cYou\u2019ll do a LOT of\u00a0advocating. I used to be a much bigger pushover and now I\u2019m pretty vocal and can make my case without bursting into tears (usually).\u201d<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Now, if you\u2019re not typically of an emotional bent, this last comment might be confusing\u2026but the bottom line is that it can become emotional, because these kids become\u00a0\u201cours\u201d. We lobby on their behalf and go to bat for them because someone needs to. And no one knows them like we do\u2026sometimes not even their biological families.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>And honestly, this is exactly what we signed up to do. If you have biological children, how often does someone tell you that you\u2019re doing a terrific job? Not nearly as often as you hear about it when there\u2019s an issue, right?<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>At work, are you often complimented on your attention to detail or is it more likely that you just keep trucking along with your nose to the grindstone, but when a problem\u00a0arises, that\u2019s when you hear from someone about the quality of your work?<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Now\u2026I hope I\u2019m wrong and that you are showered with praises for your stellar parenting and outstanding job performance, but more often than not, I think it\u2019s the opposite. Not\u00a0that compliments\u00a0DON\u2019T come\u2026they definitely do. But it\u2019s not as often as maybe we\u2019d like, or feel that they are warranted.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Point being: foster care is no different from anything else you do in life. If you are in the trenches and making an impact on the life of a child, just know that changing the trajectory of the child\u2019s life for the better is the biggest and best praise you could ever receive.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Sincerely,<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>Kris<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So\u00a0here\u2019s the thing: if you are looking for lots of pats on the back or praise and accolades, being a foster parent (or any job in social work, actually) might not be for you.\u00a0 \u00a0To be fair, it\u2019s not that no one sees what you do or that your time, energy and effort are not […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9669","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-kriss-corner"],"yoast_head":"\nKris' Corner- Pats, Praise & Accolades - Firefly Children and Family Alliance<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/fireflyin.org\/cnh\/resources\/news-library\/kris-corner-pats-praise-accolades\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Kris' Corner- Pats, Praise & Accolades - 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