{"id":10190,"date":"2020-12-29T15:59:46","date_gmt":"2020-12-29T20:59:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fireflyin.org\/?p=10190"},"modified":"2025-02-25T12:06:08","modified_gmt":"2025-02-25T17:06:08","slug":"the-most-wonderful-and-dreaded-time-of-the-year","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fireflyin.org\/cnh\/resources\/news-library\/the-most-wonderful-and-dreaded-time-of-the-year\/","title":{"rendered":"THE MOST \u201cWONDERFUL\u201d AND \u201cDREADED\u201d TIME OF THE YEAR"},"content":{"rendered":"

By: Jamise\u00a0Kafoure; Counselor<\/p>\n

The end of each year inevitably marks a significant \u201cshift\u201d in conversations when counseling clients. I often hear fear, ambivalence, depression, anxiety, dread, and angst expressed within our conversations, as these emotions directly relate to the upcoming holidays. The central theme of these discussions is either “loss” or “change” of some type.<\/p>\n

Grief and loss can knock our legs out from under us when we least expect it.\u00a0 These feelings can come\u00a0from the death of a loved one, change of a relationship, or fear due to loss of job\/income and how to provide for our families.\u00a0 These feelings can also come from the separation of family\u00a0members who live far away, or simply the inability to cope with the media and all the hype surrounding this \u201cjoyful\u201d time.\u00a0 \u00a0Unfortunately, there is no \u201cnormal\u201d or simple formula that helps one manage their feelings of grief and loss.<\/p>\n

The \u201cmemories\u201d of past holidays can be daunting as the \u201creality\u201d of the present is overwhelming.\u00a0 So\u2026how does one cope with the constant reminders that the holidays are quickly approaching when it only feels natural to hide under a blanket and avoid interaction with others?<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Stop\/Breathe\/Proceed. Take one day at a time and have patience with yourself.\u00a0 Try downloading and using a free app like\u00a0Headspace\u00a0<\/a>that teaches meditation.<\/li>\n
  2. Remind yourself that the holidays have a beginning, middle, and END\ud83d\ude0a<\/li>\n
  3. Practice positive affirmations and self-talk. For example, say the Serenity Prayer daily or download the free app\u00a0“Thinkup”.<\/a><\/li>\n
  4. Don\u2019t get too attached to any particular thought on any given day.\u00a0 Keep an open mind and healthy expectations for the holiday season.<\/li>\n
  5. Tell yourself: \u201cIt\u2019s OK to feel a range of emotions and I may not be happy all day every day”.<\/li>\n
  6. Acquaint yourself with the\u00a0Five Stages of Grief\/<\/a>Loss by Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross.<\/li>\n
  7. Let loved ones know that \u201cthis\u201d year will be \u201cdifferent\u201d. Be creative\u00a0and start new traditions.<\/li>\n
  8. Find a \u201csafe\u201d place\/person with whom to share your thoughts and feelings.Contact Families First.<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    (On a personal note\u2026It\u2019s been 32 years since my mother\u2019s passing, and every Thanksgiving (her favorite holiday) brings feelings of loss and joy. To honor and remember her, my siblings and I begin our festivities with a turkey neck \u201ctoast\u201d to her\u2026reliving our favorite holiday memory\u2026 sampling the turkey before dinner.)<\/p>\n

     <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    The end of each year inevitably marks a significant \u201cshift\u201d in conversations when counseling clients. I often hear fear, ambivalence, depression, anxiety, dread, and angst expressed within our conversations, as these emotions directly relate to the upcoming holidays. The central theme of these discussions is either “loss” or “change” of some type.
    \nGrief and loss can knock our legs out from under us when we least expect it. These feelings can come from the death of a loved one, change of a relationship, or fear due to loss of job\/income and how to provide for our families. These feelings can also come from the separation of family members who live far away, or simply the inability to cope with the media and all the hype surrounding this \u201cjoyful\u201d time. Unfortunately, there is no \u201cnormal\u201d or simple formula that helps one manage their feelings of grief and loss. <\/p>","protected":false},"author":19,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[18],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10190","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mental-health-selfcare"],"yoast_head":"\nTHE MOST \u201cWONDERFUL\u201d AND \u201cDREADED\u201d TIME OF THE YEAR - Firefly Children and Family Alliance<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/fireflyin.org\/cnh\/resources\/news-library\/the-most-wonderful-and-dreaded-time-of-the-year\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"THE MOST \u201cWONDERFUL\u201d AND \u201cDREADED\u201d TIME OF THE YEAR - Firefly Children and Family Alliance\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The end of each year inevitably marks a significant \u201cshift\u201d in conversations when counseling clients. I often hear fear, ambivalence, depression, anxiety, dread, and angst expressed within our conversations, as these emotions directly relate to the upcoming holidays. The central theme of these discussions is either "loss" or "change" of some type. Grief and loss can knock our legs out from under us when we least expect it. These feelings can come from the death of a loved one, change of a relationship, or fear due to loss of job\/income and how to provide for our families. These feelings can also come from the separation of family members who live far away, or simply the inability to cope with the media and all the hype surrounding this \u201cjoyful\u201d time. 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